All around me during the Reagan years was poverty where it had not been before. Poverty overtook me. I guess it could be argued that Reagan was not to blame for this. But I felt blamed myself - by him. If I couldn't find work and didn't have enough money to feed my daughter it was my own damn fault for not being white and male and Christian and hetero. He famously declared that government was not the solution, it was the problem. And, while he was in office that sure was true. He was only allowed 2 terms in the White House. Gratitude marker #2.
For 2 years in a row I hopped on the Metro bus with my daughter in the middle of January and stood in the freezing cold with throngs of people. People came from all over the country determined to see Dr. Martin Luther King Jr's birthday become a national holiday. Reagan was opposed to the holiday and said so. He only signed the bill because it passed with a veto proof majority in congress. This was a victory for the people, by the people. Gratitude marker #3.
Reagan was a hostile president. I know everybody is always talking about how likable he was. But, in 1980 Reagan went all the way to Philadelphia, MS (the place where civil rights activists Schwerner, Chaney, and Goodman were assassinated 16 years before) to give a speech. In that speech he proudly proclaimed his belief in and agreement with "state's rights". State's rights - one of the earliest code phrases for white domination and racism. As someone who's been on the receiving end of government hostility I have deep appreciation for President Obama because he is not a hostile president, even to Americans who invite his hostility. Gratitude marker #4.
During the Reagan reign I learned to defend myself politically. I learned to stand up in the face of repression and government surveillance to assert my rights to dissent. I learned new respect for my mother, a life time civilian employee of the DOD, who repeatedly told us kids that the government regularly spies on us all. A friend in the anti-nuke movement had her trash intercepted by the authorities more than once. A provocateur showed up at a civil disobedience training I was giving. She spent the whole time saying the most incredibly stupid things about busting the police in the head. My co-trainer and I just kept saying "Uhm, no" and burst into laughter when she finally walked out of the room. We should have been scared for those 8 years. But mostly we weren't. Gratitude marker #5.
Lastly, I like to think of Ronald Reagan as a great cosmic gift. When someone slams up against your life, sapping your joy and draining you of your life force - well, you gotta try to stop them. But to really have victory you have to forgive them for the very thing you're stopping them from doing. Crazy, I know. There is an ongoing campaign to make Reagan seem a whole lot better as a president and person than he was. But, I was there. I know that we stopped him. So, I've forgiven Ronald Reagan for his hostility and indifference to me (and to the rest of the poor, colored, queer, female of the nation). I feel good about that. As the old people used to say, I'm still on the journey and feeling the joy. Gratitude marker #6.
During the Reagan reign I learned to defend myself politically. I learned to stand up in the face of repression and government surveillance to assert my rights to dissent. I learned new respect for my mother, a life time civilian employee of the DOD, who repeatedly told us kids that the government regularly spies on us all. A friend in the anti-nuke movement had her trash intercepted by the authorities more than once. A provocateur showed up at a civil disobedience training I was giving. She spent the whole time saying the most incredibly stupid things about busting the police in the head. My co-trainer and I just kept saying "Uhm, no" and burst into laughter when she finally walked out of the room. We should have been scared for those 8 years. But mostly we weren't. Gratitude marker #5.
Lastly, I like to think of Ronald Reagan as a great cosmic gift. When someone slams up against your life, sapping your joy and draining you of your life force - well, you gotta try to stop them. But to really have victory you have to forgive them for the very thing you're stopping them from doing. Crazy, I know. There is an ongoing campaign to make Reagan seem a whole lot better as a president and person than he was. But, I was there. I know that we stopped him. So, I've forgiven Ronald Reagan for his hostility and indifference to me (and to the rest of the poor, colored, queer, female of the nation). I feel good about that. As the old people used to say, I'm still on the journey and feeling the joy. Gratitude marker #6.
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